Thursday, October 23, 2008

Oh Boy!

My son is the golden boy. Just turned three and he has come into his own. If Pierre Maguire lived in my house he would turn his back on Dion Phaneuf and gush about this lad. Now I am fully aware that I'm not the most objective guy here (although I am fully aware of the flaws of my children unlike those parents whose heads are firmly implanted up their asses) but friends and family agree that he is a special little guy. He is a smart, generous, sweet little lad who is is equally at home in a gang of munchkins or hanging out by himself, playing the pirate captain. He is still at the age where his daddy is his greatest hero but the feeling is mutual.

A week and a half ago he went to his daycare (he goes Mondays and Tuesdays) and the provider, a lovely nona, looked in the diaper bag and told him that Daddy had forgotten the pullups. (Daddy had not.) There was no wailing or gnashing of teeth on the boy's part and when I came to collect him that night he had gone through the day accident free. Just like that he was toilet trained. And in the week or so that has followed he has only had a couple of accidents.

He's brilliant even though he still occasionally shits his pants.

Anyone see that Chicago game last night? Hopefully the Oilers are like the boy and this is just an occasional thing. If not MacT may have to make a run to Shoppers.


grease trap said...

I'm going to keep it real here and simply say you're an excellent excellent writer.

Showerhead said...

My favourite part is that I never know how your posts are going to apply to the Oilers until the very last possible moment... and then WHAM, relevance for 1000.

andy grabia said...

Happy birthday, Jack!

Anonymous said...

Pretty funny stuff. I can understand seeing brilliance in your son, but the Oil? meh..
The Oil in relation to your story might easily suffer from chronic diahrea bouts all season. In laymens terms, uncontrollable bouts of shittiness :)

Great writin though.


Scott said...

This post is totally fantastic! Showerhead expressed my thoughts already.

mike w said...

Funny, you only frown when I shit my pants...

Robert said...

Hmm..Works well in a team or independently.

Looks good on a resume

Black Dog said...

Thanks guys.

Not you though, Billy. ;) Guess we'll see tomorrow night - someone has to win, right?

Black Dog said...

mike w. - it was funny the first time but I'm getting tired of wiping your ass, frankly

HBomb said...

The Oil in relation to your story might easily suffer from chronic diahrea bouts all season. In laymens terms, uncontrollable bouts of shittiness :)

Meanwhile, we have Canucks fans, who are about as intelligent as what is collected in a diaper. A better analogy yet: the Oilers are at the point on the cycle where they're getting out of diapers gradually, while the Canucks have guys that are starting to shop for going up, the other going down.

Checked the standings lately? That's right....Edmonton 2 points up on the Canucks with a game in hand. As Big Sugar once said, "Better get used to it..."

The Oilers played terrible in Chicago, and a lot better last night in Colorado, but a couple bad bounces and the 2nd half of a tough back-to-back in Denver (seems like they play that scenario at least once a year) caught up to them. They'll be ready for Saturday against the last-place Canucks.

My ONLY fear is Luongo stealing a game - a superstar goalie making an inferior team win games they shouldn't has been known to happen from time to time.

doritogrande said...

...and I just learned how toilet train a child.

This site is great! Thanks Pat.

Word Verification: carmity

PDO said...

I don't know if there's a better prose writer in the Blogosphere Pat. Your segues and analogies are better than any metaphor I could come up with. Lovin' it.

Anonymous said...

Wow, just wow. Don't stop writing and I promise not to stop reading. Let's hope the shoppers trip doesn't have to happen in Vancouver, but I hear they are open until midnight.

Anonymous said...

It will be a gem of a game tonight. Both teams want this one bad, and that always makes for a battle.
Luongo hasn't really stolen any games this year yet. Maybe our "improved" offense has him lettin up a bit :)

Hbomb- I love the fact that you seem to be defender of all things Oil. I like to think of myself as a fairly intelligent fan. I played for years, have studied for years and LOVE the Nucks. I don't really understand the depends comment. The twins, Kesler, Raymond, Burrows, Luongo, Bieksa, Edler, Bernier etc, are all young and either established or upcoming good players. With that core, its not that hard of a stretch to add a top 6 Fw and start to compete for the Cup.We still have 10 mil in cap-space which Gillis is hellbent on using.

Anyways, i'm lookin forward to the game tonight.

Nucks 4-3 in SO.


Billy said...

I figure on enterin the bloggin world a little more. So now i'm official.

Black Dog said...

There you go.

I just want to wish the Vancouver Canucks all the best this season, by the way.

HBomb said...

Billy - I think the Canucks might be in the "take one step back before taking two steps forward" part of the cycle. Mostly because there's some UFA uncertainty with their two best forwards, their best defenseman, and Luongo is up for a new deal on July 1, 2010. I should clarify that they're not Leaf-like in that they might have to spend 3-4 seasons in the hockey wilderness, but they're on a mild downslope right now, IMO.

I will admit the Oilers flaws, but from the blueline out, as a whole, I like where the Oilers are better than the Canucks. Vancouver's defense is a bit better, but I think Edmonton has a sizeable edge at forward that makes up for this, and then some.

Luongo scares me though - Vancouver has a leg up on pretty much every team in the league when it comes to goaltending (with the exception of New Jersey, the Rangers, and potentially San Jose). Tonight has the feel of the type of game the Oilers could outshoot the Canucks 42-18 and lose 2-1. But I'm going 3-2 Oilers in regulation in a game that could feature some fisticuffs.