Friday, December 15, 2006

Soap Me Up Pierre, I'm Going In


Not to beat a dead horse ... actually, who am I kidding? I have a buddy who made the mistake of admitting to trying Grecian Formula a couple years back and I still email him pictures of Maurice Richard weekly.

I'll beat this Pierre Maguire thing until its nothing but a bloody smear in the grass.

Anyhow, Dennis at IOF has been on fire lately. He's always good but lately he has been the Oilogosphere's equivalent of Jarret Stoll. Hopefully Pierre Maguire isn't trying to break into Dennis' bedroom window at night to give him a "hug".

A lot of interesting stuff in the media lately. Not so much in the facts that are being reported but in the spin. Such as today's Journal article that claimed that Bergeron's play of late has made the need for a Dman a little less pronounced. Bergeron has played well, no doubt, and he is a good bottom pair Dman. Of course, the Oilers need help in their top four. Anyhow.

And Dennis, in a post about Lupul yesterday makes it clear that apparently Robin Brownlee at the Sun has joined Maguire in lurking around the Oilers' showers, each in his Edmonton Oilers' towel, Brownlee having a # 15 and Maguire #16 of course, just waiting for the boys to come in so they can wash their backs if need be. Apparently its not Joffrey's fault that he has been a big bag of suck for the most part. Its, uh, Horcoff's. Maybe we could send Joffrey to the desert to play with another noted suckass, your man Mike Comrie. Good thing you escaped the gulag, Mike. Are you enjoying Phoenix? Weather's nice, I guess. Anyhow, the spin has started and while Torres and Stoll have been carrying the mail since Smytty and Hemsky went down (not to mention Bergeron's improvement), Lupul stands out as the one guy who has done the least. Horcoff has not been great at times but at least he's doing stuff without the puck. But apparently its not his fault. But so it goes. The media cues on something (sometimes with some direction) and away they go.

After Maguire's description of Stoll (who has been terrific mind you) last week, I keep expecting to turn on my TV and see TSN bringing Maguire, buck naked and fully erect, announcing breathlessly that Jarret has been inducted into the HHOF immediately.

Monstrous!

But Maguire, Brownlee and the Journal's foibles are symptomatic of the sports media these days. Nary a word was said back in the day when Punch and Judy hitters starting cranking out 35 home runs a year and guys like Bonds and Sosa, suddenly had their hat sizes grow five times this big, sort of like the Grinch. Only the head, get it? Seriously, I'm of the same age bracket as these clowns and believe me, when you're pushing 40, you don't start getting a gigantic sized melon. You might get larger everywhere else but the noggin's not going anywhere.

As a Cubs' fan, I follow them pretty closely and the Chicago Tribune, owners of said ball team, is always an interesting read. Never ever was Sosa's suddenly burgeoning coconut mentioned. And while there is criticism of the team, its interesting to note that certain players/management are untouchable, until contracts start coming due or its time for someone to take the fall for what is now 98 years without a World Series. Then suddenly, columns begin to appear about a player's selfishness etc etc. Next thing, said player is on his way out of town.

But that's an old game and one that is played everywhere that a newpaper has ties to the local team or where columnists are chummy with said team as well.

Interesting here in Toronto where for the most part the print media is openly contemptuous of the Leafs' ownership and the higher echelons of management. Ferguson and Maurice and most of the players get a pretty even handed treatment from the print guys but ownership ... of course nearly 40 years without a Cup (although about 400 years worth of excuses) might make your inkstained wretches a little jaded.

Here its the radio and TV guys who are out and out shills. Witness Bill Watters' shameless lobbying for career underachiever and defensive liability (as well as playoff choke artist) Bryan McCabe to be included on the Canadian Olympic team last season or the elevation of the supremely untalented goonish self promoter Tahir Domi to Maple Leaf Saint and TSN panellist.

Ken Campbell noted in the Globe and Mail blog (where the Hat slyly referred to the Leafs as God's team today - heh) the other day how only in Leafland would a lowkey reunion of the 93 Leafs organized by Wendel Clark be turned into an event akin to the lads returning from Europe in 1945. Of course Richard Peddie took every possible opportunity to display the goings on in the luxury box where they were drinking and eating, setting off roars from the Leaf faithful. (Or were those screams of terror as they tried to figure out what was blocking out all of the light - oh its just Peter Zezel, all 750 pounds of him.) A sad comment on the Leafs' franchise, as Campbell noted, that a team that went all the way to the Stanley Cup semifinals!!!, is so deified.

But so goes the spin in Leafland, where winning long ago took a back seat to selling condos and merchandise. The Leafs are now a brand, like the Chicago Cubs.

And like any good brand, they know how to spin a story.

This Oilers' stuff. Small potatoes.

But don't drop that soap!

1 comment:

gary b said...

i dunno, is all this 'homer-itis' a result of the big playoff run?

Calgary and it's supporters have exhibited similar 'symptoms', and it's a few seasons removed from their big 'almost'...


thank gawd for guys like Ray Ferraro - at least he's critical on occasion.

I swear if i ever meet Gene Principe on the street, i'd be tempted to ask him if he had his 'negative' gland removed...