Monday, May 01, 2006

Late Breaking News

From the Globe and Mail today:

The last time the Oilers won a six-game playoff series at home was in 1992. Edmonton eliminated the Vancouver Canucks by a score of 3-0. Netting the winning goal was Craig MacTavish, now the Oilers' head coach, who couldn't recall the goal earlier today.

"Against L.A.? Vancouver? I know it was a thing of beauty."

While MacTavish said earlier today that he would make no changes to the Oilers' winning lineup from Game 5 a late report out of Edmonton says that fourth line centre Rem Murray will not dress tonight. While early speculation was that youngster Marc Andre Pouliot had returned early from a bout of mono it appears that MacTavish, the NHL's last player to go without a helmet, will suit up to centre Ethan Moreau and Radek Dvorak.

Said MacTavish - "I figure with my historical Game 6 success I can contribute offensively, something we really need from our 4th line. Horcoff diving in front of that shot really inspired me but I'm not turning my head, no way. Old time hockey boys. Christ I'm younger then Chelios. Why not? And I'm faster then Rem. Better to be on the ice then behind the bench. I'm ready to stroke out here".

When asked to comment from the early bird buffet Chelios put his teeth back in, waved his cane and said "Tell MacT to keep his head up!"

After Oiler practice Murray said "I have a floppy neck."

1 comment:

Alana said...

No comments? This is fucking hilarious!